Home

My husband and I live in Lawrence, MA, one of the three cities where a series of gas explosions displaced thousands of residents last weekend. My husband is 23 months sober. Home is more than a building. It is more than a physical place. It is much more than a shelter. This is a post …

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From Tar

Amidst an epidemic, my husband is 540 days clean from heroin. Until we have seen someone's darkness, we don't really know who they are. Until we have forgiven someone's darkness, we don't really know what love is. -Marianne Williamson This morning my husband went somewhere before work to get a space heater for his office. …

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Hope Shot

On October 12, 2016 my husband detoxed from opioids in our home. He entered rehab for 45 days after that. Today, after almost 15 years battling prescription painkiller and then heroin (is there really much of a difference?) addiction, he is 491 days sober and this past January he received a promotion after only one …

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Los Tres Reyes

January 6th is Three Kings Day, El Día de los Tres Reyes. It is the 12th day of Christmas and is also known as the “Feast of the Epiphany”. In Puerto Rico (and many Latin American countries), this day is celebrated with the same importance as Christmas. Children may place shoes at the door and …

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White Christmas

Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening -By Robert Frost Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow. My little horse must think it queer To stop without a farmhouse near Between the …

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More

Days sober: 377 The fear has fallen away leaving space for MORE. Living with and loving an actively using addict was maddening, soul crushing, chaos. Prison walls closing in, life a small cell. There was only room for fear. I never want to go back. On October 8, 2017 my husband celebrated one year of …

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Bike Lights

My husband and I laughed today. We laughed at the absurdity and insanity of addiction. Sometimes in recovery you must laugh. Because if you don't, you may find yourself crying all the damn time.  In California my husband speed balled. He smoked dope and meth together to create a potent high. When he did this …

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  Sober Summer

Days Sober: 257 It is June 25, 2017. I am lying on the beach in Plum Island Massachusetts. My husband is next to me on the blue cotton quilt we have always used as a beach blanket. I look out to the jetty, it's gray and irregular rocks like long daggers, outstretched blades on either …

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La Frontera

I am writing to you from la frontera, the borderlands.  I live in the desert. The vultures scream above me flapping wings, blizzard of feathers, revolting in the bleak sky. The dry heat envelops, wraps its arms around me, rocking and quieting me. Sunlight blinding. Atop white hot rocky formations, the heart is barren. I …

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Love In Recovery 

Sonnet XVII I don’t love you as if you were a rose of salt, topaz,    or arrow of carnations that propagate fire:    I love you as one loves certain obscure things,    secretly, between the shadow and the soul.  I love you as the plant that doesn’t bloom but carries    the light …

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