Hope Shot

On October 12, 2016 my husband detoxed from opioids in our home. He entered rehab for 45 days after that. Today, after almost 15 years battling prescription painkiller and then heroin (is there really much of a difference?) addiction, he is 491 days sober and this past January he received a promotion after only one …

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Los Tres Reyes

January 6th is Three Kings Day, El Día de los Tres Reyes. It is the 12th day of Christmas and is also known as the “Feast of the Epiphany”. In Puerto Rico (and many Latin American countries), this day is celebrated with the same importance as Christmas. Children may place shoes at the door and …

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Eternal Goodbye

It's never too late. Until it is. Words from my husband in quotations. "The game has changed." Fentanyl has changed the opioid epidemic. We are now facing an overdose epidemic with devastating and deadly reach. The potency of fentanyl creates through-the-roof tolerances, and intensifies the brains dependence on dope. It's also a killer. "In the …

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White Christmas

Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening -By Robert Frost Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow. My little horse must think it queer To stop without a farmhouse near Between the …

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More

Days sober: 377 The fear has fallen away leaving space for MORE. Living with and loving an actively using addict was maddening, soul crushing, chaos. Prison walls closing in, life a small cell. There was only room for fear. I never want to go back. On October 8, 2017 my husband celebrated one year of …

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Colonized Heart

My heart is in Puerto Rico. I am not starving or homeless, I am not without food and medicine, I do not overlook flooded streets, and I am not forced to drink contaminated water. While I am not suffering the physical effects of subjugation, the impact of repression on the soul is savage. My body …

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Price for Life

Artist: Albert Taino Painting: Areizaga For Puerto Rico : She fell to ground, blood red, from wild mother flamboyan. Now a tiny colonized flower grows in occupied cement crack, fragile tendrils reach up to stormy skies desperately seeking sun, resilient wind -blown petals await rain. The Flamboyan tree could be seen all over Puerto Rico. …

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The Big C

She is a friend of my mind. She gather me, man. The pieces I am, she gather them and give them back to me in all the right order.-Toni MorrisonI had to take the day off of work today. Not in the fun, play hooky, vacation way. Today was not that kind of summer day. …

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The Trail

It has been a while since I have written. I know in early recovery this could mean many things, including bad things. It could mean relapse. My husband, by the grace of God, is still sober. In mid October, he will be one year clean.  I have not written because we have been enjoying a …

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Bike Lights

My husband and I laughed today. We laughed at the absurdity and insanity of addiction. Sometimes in recovery you must laugh. Because if you don't, you may find yourself crying all the damn time.  In California my husband speed balled. He smoked dope and meth together to create a potent high. When he did this …

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