How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I say it quietly or loudly? With a gentle caress or like a harsh stinging slap to the cheek? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 
Do I write it in a note with wet curving ink-pen strokes or do I let it vibrate from melancholy vocal cords? Will it be from bent knees or upon two feet standing? 

Like a flash of light or a slow fading dimmer? Do I utter malicious lies or proclaim crystal clear truths? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I express it meekly like a reticent mouse or do I release it with the roar of a savage lion?  Will my words wrap in tightly coiled snake rings or embrace with the expansive fins of the stingray? 

How i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I surrender it with apologies or do I demand an explanation?  Will it be in hushed whispers or shall I scream at the top of my lungs? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I use email, signed with my full name or just send it in acronyms via text? Do I LOL or do I SMH? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I say it in a rush like catching the NYC subway…to wherever…or do I say it in a sloooowww southeeeeern draaaawwwwwl? With delicate words upon snowflakes or with the skull crunching blow of the hammer? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend?

With the hot flash of a momentary lightning bolt or do I take my time with words upon rolling thunder? Will I tell you beachside with refreshing straw sips from cool coconuts or in desolate desert spitting sandy words from parched, cracked lips and grit filled teeth? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I meow the words, tickling your ear with an independent whisker or do I bark with the wagging tail of your most loyal companion? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I say it face to face or in the dark masked confessional with the shadows? Do I avert my gaze or do I look unflinching into your eyes? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Shall I weave the words from loom’s silken wool or ship foreign manufactured sentence-filled packages from lonely brick factories? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Shall my words be the last sun rays at dusk melting into ocean horizon or will they wake you with dawn’s first pop of sunlight accompanied by the shrill rooster’s crow? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Do I serenade an audience? Shall I do it in song or do I recite it in poetry’s rhyme? Or shall I talk to the wall in windowless institutional rooms? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

With choppy staccato notes or with the longing of a continuous melody that is legato? With a solitary tear or in bellowing lung-wracked sobs? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Will it be an earthly ride on the ancient shell of a tortoise or a heavenly flight upon the soaring jet plane with fuel engines burning? Will it be a sudden burst of flame or the bubbling spring of a meandering brook? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Shall I release it like the gunpowder shot from cold hollow barrel or do I take my time like an orchid’s wild bloom? Do I speak in rushed execution or narrate serving a life sentence? 

How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

How will you listen when i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

Will you listen? 

Right before I started writing my story in this blog, I picked up the phone and told my best friend in San Diego the whole truth about my husband’s addiction. I finally started talking, and then I started writing. I am lucky because when I was ready to talk, my best friend listened without judgment. That listening ear, and all of yours, have helped to save me (us). 

If someone comes to you, ready to talk, I urge you to take the time to listen. 

Days Sober: 198

Fight stigma, resist addiction, keep talking, keep listening,  peace and love out there. 

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21 thoughts on “How do i tell you my husband is a dope fiend? 

  1. I get it. Most people don’t have a clue. Im glad you had someone willing to listen! I have been on both sides of the addiction track. It is a CRAZY world. We will never be the same but Oh how much we have REALLY learned about life. Thank you for your post. You are SO talented. Mary Brooks dsmpbrooks@cox.net

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    Liked by 1 person

  2. ourtraveltrailer

    This is amazing. One of the hardest things in my relationship with someone that’s addicted is having no one to talk to. I am so afraid of telling the wrong person something. I’m glad I have found blogs. It gives me hope for my relationship. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I now talk quite openly about my sons addiction to alcohol. It’s funny how some people want to listen and learn, others scuttle away as if I have said a dirty word and could somehow contaminate them just by saying it.
    There are also different levels of interest. You always know when they have experienced in someway addiction.
    Keep writing 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So many have been touched by addiction here in the US, but we still suffer the harmful effects of stigma, in addiction and mental health. How is the mental health care and substance abuse treatment there in the UK? Do people have good access and care? Are you guys struggling with an opioid epidemic the way we are?

      I know powerful pharmaceutical companies and mass incarceration with a failed ‘war on drugs’ has really created a mess over here. We have a problem with worshipping the dollar over human life and incarcerating poverty and sickness.

      We must take care of each other in any way we can! Thanks for stopping by. ❤️❤️

      Like

      1. We have an election here pretty soon, I’m in no way political, but I’m feeling I need to write to both local politicians to ask about their views on mental health and drug misuse. We are lucky enough to have the National Health Service here. It means my son can call an ambulance at any time and get admitted to hospital with no cost whatsoever to himself. I’m sure it has saved his life many times. But it is a sticking plaster, a temporary mend. They send him back out into the world with no support or backup. It must be costing the NHS so much money which would be better spent sending him to rehab and maybe helping him to live a life without alcohol. Rehab is Something you have to fight so hard to get here, there have been so many cut backs and now they are saying rehab doesn’t work. I must get that email sent. Thanks for the love.

        Liked by 1 person

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